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    I am the lust
    for sweet iron blood on your tongue

    I am The urge
    to fight with bare fists and broken nails

    I am the hunt
    of your desolate, desperate desires

    I am the dominant pleasure
    you hate to love

    I am Asenir
    God of Malice


    Please spare me the formalities


    ~Ginnungagap oc rp blog~
    ~Please read the rules and info pages~
    ~tracking: asenirgodofmalice~
    ~m!as:none accepting~

    http://lokistuffs.tumblr.com/post/99809543745/asenirgodofmalice-i-feel-really-bad-for-leaving

    asenirgodofmalice:

    I feel really bad for leaving this blog. Tumblr hasn’t been reliable with notes and I got sick of feeling guilty for not replying to things. My muse hasn’t left me though, she may have changed slightly in demeanour but she’s still holding strong. I just wish I had…

    Aww thanks, yeah I posted this a few months ago, things just kinda dried up, people didn’t reply or forgot and I gave up trying to remind them because in the end I began to feel my character was more of a pest than a villain.
    It’s a nice offer though so I would love to talk and/or rp because I for one loved your character and got sad when you stopped :< but yeah, I’ll hit you up with a message soon ^^

    I feel really bad for leaving this blog. Tumblr hasn’t been reliable with notes and I got sick of feeling guilty for not replying to things. My muse hasn’t left me though, she may have changed slightly in demeanour but she’s still holding strong. I just wish I had understanding people to rp with

    hushednaturesvoice:

    my character doesn’t just need lovers

    They need enemies that break them and force them to test their morals

    They need friends that will backstab them and hurt their feelings

    They need an enemy that will become a friend

    They need friends that they would lay down their life for

    They need people so close to them that they might as well be siblings

    They need fights and conflict and battles that could leave them broken and inches from death

    My character does not just need lovers

    If you want to plot with me, send me a ✯. If you’re just following just to stalk me, send me a ♡.

    grumblygardens:

    image

    If you’re an ORIGINAL CHARACTER blog please reblog.

    Athena Athena Athena look what I made!! :3

    WHERE HAVE YOU BEEN SENDING IT!

    .

    Really, the best thing to do on a Wednesday afternoon is set yourself on fire

    Reblog if you’d care if I deleted my Tumblr.

    Reblog if you DON’T only rp for the ship

    originalhybriddevil:

    I just want to see whose serious about rp. 

    ask-dreamwalkingarcherandfriends:

    I’d rather you not shit on my identity. It matters because of the violence, queerphobia, misgendering, and “reparative” therapy I’ve had to go through that other “homosapiens” as you’d like to put it, have forced on me. It matters to me, whether it matters to you or not. You can feel however about your own gender/orientation, but don’t tear mine apart in the process.

    I didn’t say I was a vegan or anything. I meant the torturing or abuse of animals, because humans deemed them less. You believe we’re all the same—which means we shouldn’t brutalize each other; and in this case, us to them.

    I’m really not catching on with the psych talk. I mean I get it. It’s fucked up. I understand it intellectually. But you just have to move on, or do something about it. 

    We don’t “put emotions into things.” Intellect and emotion are not mutually exclusive ideologies. You said we’re animals? Animals have feelings, and it’s been proved time and time again. They also combine emotions and standards. 

    You don’t “become” psychopathic. It’s a disorder, and it’s serious. It’s Anti-Social Personality Disorder, and it’s something that’s always there in the person who has it. And if you think that’s the case… there is help for you. And from what I’ve read, from you, you seem to fit the criteria. You need help. 

    None of us asked to be human. We just are. And while there is really shitty things that come with that, there is beauty in humanity too. We’ve done just as many good things as bad. It’s fucking hard to think about, I’ll give you that, but you’re not helping yourself by demonizing humans.

    But I can’t force you to anything, you’re in a different country several time zones away, it doesn’t matter what I think, does it?

    "I’d rather you not shit on my identity. It matters because of the violence, queerphobia, misgendering, and “reparative” therapy I’ve had to go through that other “homosapiens” as you’d like to put it, have forced on me. It matters to me, whether it matters to you or not. You can feel however about your own gender/orientation, but don’t tear mine apart in the process."

    I’m saying that everybody should accept each other. gender and orientation shouldn’t cause other people to have any reaction because it’s who you are. That obviously got misinterpreted.

    I never said you were vegan and i also meant the torture of animals.

    How exactly do i move on from something that i can’t get out of?

    I really don’t care how others perceive me because being like this helps a lot better than how i used to be. I already know i am unstable. I don’t plan to do anything about it. I just act for everyone else if needs be. On here I just speak my mind.

    "demonising humans". funny when we created demons. but seriously. I’m not interested in the good things people have to offer, the bad things are always more interesting anyway. I just don’t want society, I want to build to my own place and kill my own food. but even then people "own" land and you have to buy that land with money, which you have to earn by obeying orders etc etc. 

    What you think matters, just not entirely to me. I can empathise with where you are coming from, i understand the reasons why.  They just don’t coincide with what I am wanting or needing.

    I really don’t want to abandon the “good terms” we were on, so perhaps we should talk another day when I am not so cold and unstable.

    ask-dreamwalkingarcherandfriends:

    I’m very connecting to my characters (they’ve been my coping methods since I was a teen) so I tend to take things very personal. (In addition to anxiety.) It makes me uncomfortable to put them in a situation where they’re viewed as less than because of their gender. I’m just, not down for that. And that’s cool, and it’s fine that you’re into the interesting side.

    I don’t think you “had” depression—I think you still do. Maybe some of it waned, but you’re not better. This sounds really shitty on a text level, and in person, I’d like to think this would come out differently. I care about you, that’s why I’m saying these things. And I’ve been where you are. Suicidal, angry, and the everything that comes with it.

    I don’t like how the world works. I don’t like how society runs. I don’t like how it puts people like me — queer, disabled, etc— on some lower tier. I don’t like how capitalism fucks everyone over, and the respondent communism is oppressive. I’ve got problems with the world.

    I just responded to it differently than you. I became an activist. I… I don’t know, wish you’d not become cold to it. People are fucked up, I’ll give you that. We’re not supposed to be like this.

    You seem to have a very… difficult situation. Sorry, I’m really bad with words on a personal, nonfictional level. I don’t know how to help in that way. I’m, well, okay with evolution. I’m okay with humans progressing. (I’m not okay to with what humans do to our fellow animals, however.) 

    But, I do understand not wanting to live because you’re disappointed and don’t give a shit about yourself. I get that. I’ve been there, and I balance between being there and not. I really, honest-to-god, understand. But that doesn’t mean you should go. 

    I want to ask you to get help. To talk to someone. You have a chance to be alive, and you’re intelligent as hell. You could change the world. I don’t want you to go. But that’s a selfish request and I know it.

    I understand the personal tether. 

    I had therapy and “help” in previous years.

    My situation has no points or reasoning to give a reason. People find their own reason to live. I just don’t have mine. as for your view on the world, I understand where you are coming from but it isn’t what i’m trying to say. yes there are “queers” and everything but i really don’t care. You’re just humans. Who gives a damn. You are homosapiens with your own mind and instinct complex, what you feel like or what you are attracted to or not attracted to sexually, is human. Why label someone something other than their name.

    As for animals. We need to eat them for food, sustenance. We are omnivores and need both backgrounds of food. Yes some people offer shelter then take it away to animals i.e. pets. But they are just another form of relationship with undeveloped consciousness’. If someone treats a companion animal badly then naturally the animal would become hostile towards the adoptee for bad treatment or would end up dying. The world has various levels of cruel. And that will never go away.

    We develop attachments to company and we find and replace it in different ways. Some people just aren’t made to be leaders and they are the stupid arrogant assholes who think they can do anything and end up destroying lives. Those who are leaders are precise and can empathise with anyone while keeping their own mind secure. 

    In the world we live in we have made odd standards from empathy yet we still break them enough that we would go to war and kill each other. However we do not kill the people we know in the streets for equal disrespect. We are odd and distinguished but sometimes I wish we’d just find what humanity wants and deal with it. We will never have peace along as we are human, but we will never all be fighting.

    Being intelligent is a burden. It’s what’s got me here in the first place. Everything makes too much sense. But people go and put emotions into things and disrespect said emotions. The world is annoying and i don’t see a place for me in it.
    My only danger is knowing that I have the same amount of sadness for killing someone else as I do myself. And that is currently none at all. I am becoming psychopathic, i’ll admit that. But i never wanted to be human so it doesn’t really matter then does it. 

    ask-dreamwalkingarcherandfriends:

    asenirgodofmalice:

    I guess I have a few reasons.
    For one, I have this personal sort of law that I will not approach other people as I don’t want to pressure them to rp with the character I’ve created and her *cough* habits. So it means that I don’t get as many rp partners as I could get.
    Even so, my partners tend to just up and leave without explanation (I check to see if they are away and remind them after a while but it’s still the same).

    Apart from moaning about lack of partners, I just don’t have a purpose or reason to be alive so I’m thinking about shutting this blog down so it’s not up when I leave. (No I’m not depressed I just have nothing.)

    Another reason for shutting down is the fact that I am rping in the TF2 community on deviantart and may move said rping to tumblr if I can’t be bothered to find a way to die.

    Furthermore, I’ve been thinking about joining the army so I wouldn’t have time anyway.

    Well that’s the gist of it. Not in any particular order mind you, just a bundle of things that have been on my mind lately.

    :( I’m sorry. I would’ve loved to roleplay with you, but Asenir seemed to have a misogyny thing going on (given that she disliked other women) and 95% of my muses are female, including all of my MCU OCs. I was very intimidated ^^;

    And love… thinking you don’t have a purpose/reason to live/wanting to die are all signs/symptoms of depression. I’m not gonna tell you how to feel about yourself or whatever… but those aren’t typically thoughts of non-depressed people. 

    I understand not having time—whether without outside life or another blog. I guess, do what’s best, y’know? Good luck if you join the army, though.

    Well, um, you have my skype if you wanna talk to me if you leave… just don’t go away forever, please.

    "I would’ve loved to roleplay with you, but Asenir seemed to have a misogyny thing going on" that’s why I let other people decide and don’t pressure people to rp. I have had a few rps with other female characters, by default she isn’t fond of them but it’s changing her view on genders that makes rping interesting.

    "thinking you don’t have a purpose/reason to live/wanting to die are all signs/symptoms of depression." i had clinical depression for 6 years, i cut myself every month, still have scars mottling the skin on my arm. I cried almost everyday and tried to drink bleach. I was so desperate to end my life that it ruled me.
    Right now. Right now, I just don’t see the reasoning behind actually living in a twisted world ruled by money and social normalities. The world spins on being ruled by other people, and everyone has to conform to those rules. We are not who we are meant to be. Intelligence has progressed so far as to make us stupid. We should be hunting for ourselves, creating our own things. Yet we sit in luxury housing, watching mindless tv shows all day and night, not fully being real. We are not “real” people, “real” human beings are animals. They do not drive cars, they don’t use internet. They are flesh and blood and interact with the world.

    This life that I have, should have been someone else’s, because i have no reason for it, and i will not use my 1 in quadrillion opportunity. 

    I suppose you could say I am annoyed at the fact that I am alive compared to someone who could of had my place, and i am annoyed at how far the human world has come to ruin natural and instinctual nature. 

    The only thing that interests me is human psychology, although that is coming to the end of it’s tether. I can read people through writing and physical movement so actually listening to someone for more than a minute becomes tedious if i am analysing them. 

    I once thought finding someone alike to me would give me some sort of tether, but i realise that doing so would most likely put other people in danger as I have high morals but low ethics. It really doesn’t make much sense in a vague sentence but it is intricate and comes together in the end.

    I guess my reason for not living is the fact that I am disappointed and also really really don’t care if I die.

    I guess I have a few reasons.
    For one, I have this personal sort of law that I will not approach other people as I don’t want to pressure them to rp with the character I’ve created and her *cough* habits. So it means that I don’t get as many rp partners as I could get.
    Even so, my partners tend to just up and leave without explanation (I check to see if they are away and remind them after a while but it’s still the same).

    Apart from moaning about lack of partners, I just don’t have a purpose or reason to be alive so I’m thinking about shutting this blog down so it’s not up when I leave. (No I’m not depressed I just have nothing.)

    Another reason for shutting down is the fact that I am rping in the TF2 community on deviantart and may move said rping to tumblr if I can’t be bothered to find a way to die.

    Furthermore, I’ve been thinking about joining the army so I wouldn’t have time anyway.

    Well that’s the gist of it. Not in any particular order mind you, just a bundle of things that have been on my mind lately.

    I’m considering closing this blog down

    Tags: - #ooc

    sweet-red-flowers:

    people who read the ‘About’ and ‘Headcanons’ page and use that information appropriately in a thread

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